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Oh My God.
Something about the mountains and woods made my previously blocking all memories squire feel everything that brought him here with a VENGEANCE. He shared with me such horrific memories of what was done to him, admitted he'd lied about a few instances, EVEN TO HIS THERAPIST, because it was easier to explain than being collared and chained by a collar on his neck in a CAGE maybe a foot taller and about three feet wider than Eric himself is and was lead around on two chains, one attached to the front and one attached to the back of his wielded collar so the orcs could force him to walk when they wanted him out...
It was easier to say he'd been beaten extensively and occasionally tormented by magic than the truth that he was actually being used as some kind of magical subject of experimentation. He's had his chest cut open so that their big bad, Venger, could watch his spells as they worked on human organs, always managing to stop short of killing him and healing them instead, always enough so that he never exactly was dragged out of the experimenting room in pain, but considering he'd never been numbed to any of the procedures themselves and instead was chained to a table...
It's a wonder showing him The Princess Bride those weeks ago didn't kill him then and there, but now I think it is not much surprise that he enjoys that movie so much. Westley after all, gets rescued and maybe it reminds him a little of what he held out hope for would happen to him and never did.
I found out that story too... He was offered as ransom for any of the others of his friends and they decided, even the nice girl and the unicorn, to leave him as he was and My God it is making me sick to keep typing this sordid tale for much longer or in more detail than I have been allowed to give or if I even am allowed, I did not ask, just came in here to do it anyway because I hardly know how else I might deal with this without someone noticing that I have collapsed from sheer exhaustion in one bout with weapons or another.
It fills me with equally as much fury as if Eric had been my very own little brother from the start, and it makes my stomach do that thing where it knots up and settles deep and cold inside your gut and does not manage to untangle itself ever as you ponder what the thing is that you must do now. For now, I told him to keep talking when he feels the need to do it, though he should not feel that he has to, that I was glad he could remember some and will help him with the rest of the things as they happen to come in.
Maybe I should have played distraction again rather than say that to him, and encourage him to dwell on what once was. Will that respark the nightmares he says he only has a few times in a week now that he has suddenly come to an understanding of those detailed and worse than what he lied about before.
He's off the hook for lying naturally. I can handle lying when it is on the scale of THIS and if you get off on verbal twisting exercises...well...
Have I done the right thing today or ought I to have done something more to help him?
Simon? River? Those of you rescued from the facilities? You're likely the closest I can get to for help in the matter now. What would any of you have done/have wanted done/whatever. I can scarce think of what to do now...
Something about the mountains and woods made my previously blocking all memories squire feel everything that brought him here with a VENGEANCE. He shared with me such horrific memories of what was done to him, admitted he'd lied about a few instances, EVEN TO HIS THERAPIST, because it was easier to explain than being collared and chained by a collar on his neck in a CAGE maybe a foot taller and about three feet wider than Eric himself is and was lead around on two chains, one attached to the front and one attached to the back of his wielded collar so the orcs could force him to walk when they wanted him out...
It was easier to say he'd been beaten extensively and occasionally tormented by magic than the truth that he was actually being used as some kind of magical subject of experimentation. He's had his chest cut open so that their big bad, Venger, could watch his spells as they worked on human organs, always managing to stop short of killing him and healing them instead, always enough so that he never exactly was dragged out of the experimenting room in pain, but considering he'd never been numbed to any of the procedures themselves and instead was chained to a table...
It's a wonder showing him The Princess Bride those weeks ago didn't kill him then and there, but now I think it is not much surprise that he enjoys that movie so much. Westley after all, gets rescued and maybe it reminds him a little of what he held out hope for would happen to him and never did.
I found out that story too... He was offered as ransom for any of the others of his friends and they decided, even the nice girl and the unicorn, to leave him as he was and My God it is making me sick to keep typing this sordid tale for much longer or in more detail than I have been allowed to give or if I even am allowed, I did not ask, just came in here to do it anyway because I hardly know how else I might deal with this without someone noticing that I have collapsed from sheer exhaustion in one bout with weapons or another.
It fills me with equally as much fury as if Eric had been my very own little brother from the start, and it makes my stomach do that thing where it knots up and settles deep and cold inside your gut and does not manage to untangle itself ever as you ponder what the thing is that you must do now. For now, I told him to keep talking when he feels the need to do it, though he should not feel that he has to, that I was glad he could remember some and will help him with the rest of the things as they happen to come in.
Maybe I should have played distraction again rather than say that to him, and encourage him to dwell on what once was. Will that respark the nightmares he says he only has a few times in a week now that he has suddenly come to an understanding of those detailed and worse than what he lied about before.
He's off the hook for lying naturally. I can handle lying when it is on the scale of THIS and if you get off on verbal twisting exercises...well...
Have I done the right thing today or ought I to have done something more to help him?
Simon? River? Those of you rescued from the facilities? You're likely the closest I can get to for help in the matter now. What would any of you have done/have wanted done/whatever. I can scarce think of what to do now...
sick