msdemeanour

Day two: Saturday Oct 6th

Wed, 10 Oct 2007 13:06:34 GMT

I hate dramatising situations like this, or posting situations like this gratuitously. I am sharing this experience, yes, but it's mostly for me to document and look back on. To go back to and see his progress or his decline. And to provide a record of the man I call Dad.

Today I got to the hospital at 8am. I went to his room to check on his status and see if Kay wanted breakfast. I took her order and headed down to the plaza I work in. I wasn't in any mood for taking chances with cafe's I'm not familiar with and ending up with a $5 cup of crap coffee, so I decided to go with what I know. My gorgeous girls in Cibo. I got our coffees, (extra shots in each) and some ham and cheese croissant, and while they got my order ready, I popped into the nearby newsagent for a paper, about six different magazines and a pack of Kent, then picked up the food and back to the hospital.

After Kay and I ate, we both fell asleep in the visitor's lounge and then Dad's neurologist arrived. The good news is, the fact that Dad didn't die last night means there is a good chance he'll survive. It's still touch and go between now and Monday, so we'll know more then.

Dad had another CT scan today and the clot in his brain hasn't grown. He's still having moments of clarity peppered with moments of confusion, but his sense of humour is rock solid, even when his suffering is truly evident.

This afternoon, mum came for a visit and Kay had gone home to shower, feed the dogs and get her diabetes meds. It was surreal to be the original family unit again. Dad, mum, me, Lil. Mum and dad even reminisced over some crazy woman they used to know in the 60s....

I began typing this hours ago. My brain has ceased to function normally, so I'll finish later.

~ A

Day One. Friday October 5th

Wed, 10 Oct 2007 13:04:36 GMT

My dad had a stroke today. A bad one. Doctors aren't expecting him to survive.

I just got home from the hospital, where I spent an evening with my dad, my step-mum, Kay, my step-brother Bill, my sister, Lily and the bishop of dad's church, along with some missionaries.

When Lily and I arrived at his hospital room, I immediately burst into tears and Kay asked me not to cry infront of him because he doesn't know the severity of what's happened. I went to the lounge area to compose myself before I went in to see him.

He's drifting in and out of consciousness, but when he's awake, he's so relaxed and calm, despite being in tremendous amounts of pain.

When it was Lily's and my turn to sit with him, (only two visitors allowed at a time), we lightened the load by making a few jokes with him and even had him laughing. Baring in mind the no crying near him rule, I really focussed hard on not becomming emotional. Then, Lily went to get him some water and he reached for my hand. We held hands and stared at each other silently for a while and then Dad said this;

Dad: My beautiful daughter.
Me: My beautiful dad.
Dad: I've got a headache, Annie
Me: I know
Dad: I'm tired too. I'm going to sleep soon.
Me: I know (no more fighting tears, they're streaming down my face)
Dad: I love you, chick.
Me: I love you too. Thank you, dad.
Dad: Anytime, mate. Make sure you take care of Lily
Me: Always.
Me: Are you scared?
Dad: No darlin'. I'm going home.

I just wanted to record this day, incase I can't remember it, down the track.

I'm home for a rest and back to hospital in the morning. I'm not doing anything else until the moment is upon us. He brought me into the world and I want to be there when ....

I love my Dad. I love him so much